This time of year is suppose to fill us with this sense of joy and good will towards men. This year I'm am trying to get into the spirit that in the past has been so easy to find. However I find myself lacking.
I'm going through the motions with out feeling.
Like the song on Buffy, the musical episode.
I'm even trying to smile occasionally. I should be happy. My husband finally has a job and we have the money now to purchase gifts for friends and family.
But at the same time, the knowledge that my Grandpa is dying hangs like a black cloud over my head.